why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
