Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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