i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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