Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.

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  (407): this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god. http://tfl.nu/34d8
  Replies (65) Good night (13614) Bad night (815)
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  (858): View more from California

  I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.

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  (858): I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street. http://tfl.nu/fk7f
  Replies (35) Good night (8514) Bad night (733)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.

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  (832): The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went. http://tfl.nu/fpvf
  Replies (16) Good night (6247) Bad night (1133)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."

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  (318): He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later." http://tfl.nu/4lz3
  Replies (14) Good night (2413) Bad night (3732)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.

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  (304): Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life. http://tfl.nu/t3n8
  Replies (21) Good night (6107) Bad night (1603)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates

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  (772): I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates http://tfl.nu/4z1l
  Replies (3) Good night (2341) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.

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  (662): She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina. http://tfl.nu/uqet
  Replies (7) Good night (3964) Bad night (847)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.

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  (608): Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style. http://tfl.nu/f4ko
  Replies (7) Good night (1426) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT

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  (586): LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT http://tfl.nu/bpk7
  Replies (19) Good night (2348) Bad night (1210)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!

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  (415): Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM! http://tfl.nu/lg7j
  Replies (5) Good night (643) Bad night (2155)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.

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  (905): i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth. http://tfl.nu/negs
  Replies (1) Good night (440) Bad night (880)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.

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  (817): Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/5d6q
  Replies (2) Good night (1243) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.

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  (254): I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake. http://tfl.nu/f2e6
  Replies (8) Good night (529) Bad night (1290)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.

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  (713): Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon. http://tfl.nu/r8yq
  Replies (4) Good night (1302) Bad night (405)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?

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  (203): He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem? http://tfl.nu/53aj
  Replies (10) Good night (340) Bad night (1012)

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