the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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