Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Everything about him screamed your future.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
The air taste purple.
Randomize
