Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
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