True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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