I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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