Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
