For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize