Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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