thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
