i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
