Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize