took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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