I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
