I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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