you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize