Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
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I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
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who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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