even my farts smell like vagina
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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