cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
