i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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