i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
