whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize