Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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