Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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