with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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