i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
