I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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