So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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