OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize