Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic