she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
