I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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