Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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