If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
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i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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