Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
