really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
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