? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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