love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
