remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
