Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
