just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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