He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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