I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
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He passed out mid-signature
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
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Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
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