My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
