Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
