shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
