just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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