I want to have your abortion
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
