I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
It's rum buckets o'clock
this is an emotional support booty call
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize