You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
...so i touched it.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
